Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Na-na na-na boo-boo.

 I have literally tried to write this post for days weeks. But every time I sit down to write it, I find something better to do. It's that simple really. But alas, I can put this off no more. With the end of the year sneaking up on me, it seemed like a suitable time to post a little update. As I haven't written in what feels like a year, I am inclined to use my beloved bullet points...again. I know, I know. It's lazy and I am better than that. Except I'm not. So lower your bar.

*We won the championship in my Australian league! We finished 25-2 and swept both series to get to the championship game.

*I was supposed to go play in Germany following my season in Australia. Buuuuuuuut I didn't go.

*Why, you ask? The answer is two-fold: I could not bare to part with my sausage BFF and the team I had signed with couldn't meet me halfway on something, so I walked. Actually, I did just the opposite of walking--I sat. I sat for dayyyyyyyys and did nothing. (I'm not sold that sitting is the opposite of walking, but you catch me drift).

*I'm still in Australia (though sitting a lot less these days) living off the generosity of others and enjoying my first off season in 2 years. And I am happy as a clam, presuming clams are happy, which I guess we do since we've coined that phrase. What are we basing that on, I wonder? Somewhere, out there in the world, there is one really pissed off clam that resents our expectations of their happiness.

*I was MVP of our league and the championship game. I don't think I've ever walked away from a game more thoroughly exhausted than I did that night. Thank god we won.

*Our team banquet was the following night at our stadium club room and, if I remember correctly, as I am sure I cannot, the team danced on our bar, drank from the championship trophy (which I intend to use as an absurdly large cereal bowl at some stage) and took turns cloaking ourselves in our very large banner.

*I've been coaching in my free time; I even got a coaching certificate so when people question my qualifications or skills as a coach, as they invariably will, I can shove this piece of paper in their face that says it doesn't matter if I stink... cause I sat in a room for a painful number of hours and listened to a coach talk about coaching. So I'm better than you. Na-na na-na boo-boo.

*That piece of paper is currently decorating my fridge and will remain there until I've done something more impressive and receive a piece of paper proving that. It's quite likely that paper never comes down.

*I've taken up netball. It's this sport where you can't touch the opponent or stand within 3 meters of them (I shit you not), AND that isn't even the worst part. The worst part: you have to wear a dress or a skirt. What? Why? WHAT?

*My first visitor while I am in Australia is coming in February. I know my mom came, but that doesn't count, she's my mom. She had to visit if she wanted to keep that title.

*I was starting to worry that somehow Australia wasn't a good enough bargaining chip to make putting up with me worth the trip. Here's a hot tip: if you don't wanna see me in Australia, you'll never want to.

*Matt gets here the 5th of Feb and leaves the 16th of Feb.

*Naturally, I am taking him to Bali.

*Naturally, I will use his trip as an excuse to play with some kangaroos again at the zoo.

*I dyed my hair. It's quite blonde.

*I went to an 80's themed party. I rocked the flashdance/yoga/let's get physical look. Yes, it was as uncomfortable as it looked.

*I've re-signed to come back and play again for Rocko. Pretty sure I didn't need to spell that out, but jussssssssst in case. It's been a long year, I get it.

*After winning the championship, we decided to order rings to commemorate the season. They finally arrived this past Friday and they're glorious.

*None of us want to wear our rings regularly (or at all) but we do want one night to wear them without feeling ridiculous and in a celebratory fashion. Thus, we have decided to plan a "Ring" party where we all wear our rings out in public together. There's strength in numbers.

*I'll direct your attention to my adult-like nails in the above photo. That's right, no bloody quicks, no jagged edges. Just classy, smooth tips thank you very much.

*The weather has been amazing lately. I have been taking my sausage friend to the beach for romantic walks and taking in some incredible sunsets.

*I can't go to NBA games over here, but they do have the NBL which is pretty competitive and boasts some NBA talent, most notably James Ennis who now plays for the Heat. He played here in Perth last season for the Wildcats, and I have been attending nearly every home game this season.

*I will be splitting my time on Christmas between two families this year, which I grew up doing anyways, so it feels very familiar. Afternoon tea with one family, and a bbq dinner with the next. I look forward to eating all their food.

 *And their company. *Cough*. I am totally looking forward to their company more, of course. I'm not an animal.

*My friend got a new pup. It's a labradoodle. I'm conflicted. My gut is telling me to follow my heart and befriend the pup, but then part of me feels like it's a betrayal to my sausage. Life is hard.

*My mama is coming again this coming year to visit...for twice the time. That doesn't scare me at all, what are you talking about? Psh. Why would you even say that, I am thrilled, naturally.

*KIDDING MOM! You know I want you here, surely. Jokes aren't easy to come by is all, and sometimes you are an easy punchline. I know, I know--I'm better than that. Except I'm not. You may as well keep that bar at a steady decline, people.

*I saw Justin Timberlake in concert. That guy is gonna be a star.

*I went to a "mice racing" fundraiser. It's every bit what it sounds like, and somehow legal. There's alcohol, there's gambling, there are animals racing presumably against their will and probably without proper training; how is this legal? It's absolutely appalling. Try to not hold it against me when I tell you how much fun I had that night. Zip it, it was for a good cause.

*My cousin got married! I missed it but it's still awesome and worth mentioning.

*The Lakers beat Golden State last night. Merry Christmas Lakers fans, something tells me we've reached our high point for the season.

*I miss you mama. See you on Skype tomorrow.

Merry Christmas everyone! Hope everyone has a lovely holiday celebrating the birth of Christ! Enjoy the new year as well. See you in 2015.


  1. Finally! Thank you. That was very satisfying. I don't mind about the bullets. I like 'em!

    Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! I'm glad you're so happy!

  2. Kimmie! Ugh, I am the worst. I didn't message or anything on Christmas. SO sorry! I thought about you though and missed you :)

    Glad you liked the blog. It was for you and mama obviously. I am very happy but so looking forward to seeing you in 2015!! Love you!

  3. First and foremost- thank you for taking the time to write this. Because we care— Me. Mom. The scottish lady, all of us, deeply care, about that little wiener dog.

    Work is slow today, hence really long commentary and the customary flurry of questions. Hey if you want less questions, be less interesting. Heh heh.

    • Congrats again on the championship. I assume the celebration party continues to rage on. Is there any video of the game out there? And nice ring too. Your poor fingernails. Even though they're not mangled, you chop the hell out of them.
    • About the Germs and their contracts- With your experience, you could be very helpful to someone considering euro-pro future. And how nice is it the season you are sitting out is Australian summer. Does the team have access to a gym you can use? So you don't get loose and flabby.
    • Remind me the name of your little snausage friend? Kliestro or something weird like that. Is that the Greek god of lighting or finding loose change in the sofa? Explain.
    • Doesn't it go "Na na na na, hey hey" where did this na na na na boo boo come from?
    • Netball looks fun. It's fast! I don't understand the cheerleader costume though. I watched some clips of NZ vs AUS. It looks like you can have bodily contact but not if you're the ball carrier. And it seemed like anyone can get the rebound even if a point is scored.
    • Say Hi to Matt for me. I still owe him $20 for betting he couldn't swallow a golf ball.
    • And the final photo of Kliemet, Kielbasa ... romping along, not a care in the world. What a great place to be.

    A Happy 2015 to you!